Mastication

Mastication? Noo you dirty filthy lot! MASTICATION I said! Not Masturbation!!!

Well I did it, I got my tongue pierced on Saturday. It actually wasn’t a big deal but the bar was so huge it was uncomfortable to say the least. The following day I woke up with the feeling I had a sumo wrester’s ass wedged in my mouth and there is not a darn thing I could do about it. Hence why the bar was originally so huge to allow the tongue to swell to heal properly.

My tongue is still swollen and it aches like hell.. but I am telling you straight - how the fuck do you EAT? Trying to chew is virtually impossible because you naturally want to chew the darn ball. I am managing to drink water and luke warm soup but anything else either hurts or seems to take forever - I tackled half a slice of bread yesterday evening and I had to concentrate on every bite - then attempting to get it lined up to swallow it is just unreal.

Seriously, tongue peircings look hot, no, they look hotter than hot but if I have a problem eating properly after it has healed its coming out. I love my food too much… and I could never imagine never being able to suck on a chocolate button again - that would kill me!!